WHY IS GRADSCHOOL…
SO DAMN EXPENSIVEEEEE??!
My area of study should not be dictated by what I can afford.
when you’ve just finished an 8 hr shoot and Simons calls you about some appearance
So… I spoke to my manager about the fact that one Saturdays I do a two person job for a one person pay. Anyone would have spoken up about this a long time ago but we all know I’m a coward and people scare me when it comes to asking about something.
I am FREAKING out.
There’s a few things going through my mind this lovely night and I thought I would share it because what the hell. It’s like talking to myself so I get to process things more clearly in a sense.
1. I’m more of a hopeless romantic that I ever thought myself to be. I find myself craving that romanticism. The surprises, you know, to kinda show someone is thinking about you. Anything. It can be a tennis bracelet you’ve always wanted, to flowers, to the cookies you crave when you’re having a bad day. Something that shows that someone pays attention to the little details that make you who you are. I want this… I need this. But how do you say it without sounding like a complete asshole?
2. Having someone be completely honest about what they like about you and what they don’t like about you is kinda like having people sing happy birthday to you… You’re praised for about 30 awkward seconds where you don’t know what to do with yourself then after you cut the cake, the praise is over, and you realize it’s a strawberry cake and you hate strawberries.
3. I hate confrontation. Now, I know this. I’ve always known it. But for some reason it seems to be going through my mind a lot recently. I never stand up for myself and sometimes I don’t say what I mean so someone else doesn’t feel bad. Now this is not a case of “if you have nothing nice to say…” but is more of a “no no, it’s ok… my feelings aren’t hurt” when they kinda are. I get over stuff quickly, very quickly, however, I use this to justify hiding my real feelings in regards to something and not saying what I mean. Women are said to do this a lot and expect men to read our minds. The problem is that I don’t want my mind read. I want to forget about it and put my feelings aside until they go away.
4. I’m a coward. Now, this ties into my previous point…. I don’t say what I mean because I’m afraid of people’s reaction. I beat around the bush until I make myself sick because I’m afraid.
This is so fucking stupid…. Why am I telling the wrong people these things?
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Fact submitted by: speckledwillow
I really don’t understand people…
When a friend wants to talk about something I’m more than happy to listen. I may have my concerns for what they are telling me but unless they explicitly ask for my opinion I normally keep it to myself. It’s very rare for me to feel comfortable enough with someone to share all my fears with them. I’ve only had one person be that for me my whole life and that’s kevwinchester. But last night I decided I was comfortable enough with a friend to talk out some of the things that were keeping me up at night… I have never felt so frustrated in my life. I always listen to this friend’s problems and when I share mine I got shot down. He says that he was being honest and that “honesty isn’t for everyone.” I didn’t ask for him to be honest with me. But you know what? It’s my fucking fault but he does this all the time. I don’t know what his problem is but this is why I don’t have many friends. I can sit here and listen to how fucked up he got last night and how getting back together with his drunk ex gf is awesome but when it comes to the real shit he wants to be “honest”
Fucking A. I’m so angry.